How not to promote yourself on YouTube

On April 5th, I received this message from another YouTube user:

Hey Graham
Any Chance Of Doing A Video Reviewing My Band.
I Am Sure You Will Rip Us Apart And It Would Be A Funny Project To Complete.
If You Wish To Appear In Our Video Let Us Know That Would Rock lol

I wrote back saying "Sorry, but I'm busy with my own videos and don't have the time right now". And they wrote back with this:

Hey Graham
You Know I Always Love Your Channel.
Sure Would Be Fun To Do A Song With You When You Get Chance.
lol Can't Believe You Answered Me.
YOU ROCK

and that could have been the end of it. They asked; I said Sorry, no. 

Then, a week later:

Hey Graham
Any-chance Of Commenting On This Song.
Post One Of Your Videos On My Songs.

 And a day after that:

Hey Graham
If You Post One Of Your Videos On One Of Mine, I Promise It Will Get Action All Day Long lol.
Plus Of Course This Would Mean That I Know Someone Famous Which Is Not A Bad Thing lol.
I Love You Twitter Video.

And the following week:

Hey Graham
New Song Here, Please Post One Of Your Videos On It.
You Rock

Now, if you make stuff - whether it's music or art or sequences of words or cartoons or whatever - it's natural to want to get that stuff out to as many people as possible. And if you find someone who does stuff that you like, you probably want them to like your stuff too. And if they have a bigger audience than you, you'd probably like them to share your stuff with their audience, or even work with you on your stuff. 

Nothing at all wrong with any of that, and it does no harm to get in touch with the people you like and ask.

What I don't know is if the approach illustrated above works. I don't know because I've never tried it. On the occasions I've written to More Famous People asking them if they'd collaborate, and they've said "Sorry but No", I've thanked them and left it there. 

But who knows, maybe if I'd pushed it they would have changed their mind and said "Hey you know what, I'm not so busy after all and I will make it my mission to help you achieve the recognition you crave." Maybe I'm not tenacious enough. 

And maybe I was being a total dick when after receiving this message, yesterday...

Hey Graham
I Know Your Channel Rocks.
However I Can Make It Rock More. Box Me And I Will Box You Back. Show Some Love Bud.
Post One Of Your Videos On My Songs, PLEASE
You Rock

...I wrote back saying something like "Come on, this is getting a bit spammy now." 

Because that reply got me this:

Spam Is What You Put On A Sandwich lol
I Thought You Knew That Graham.
Ok I Be On My Way, Won't Bother You Again.
You Talk About Being Polite, You Have Never Stopped By Any Of My Songs And Left A Comment. I Guess Your No Different From The People On Your Twitter Video.
So Lets Just Ignore Each Other In Real Time.
Thank You Graham You Have Restored My Faith In People.
Have A Great Weekend.

So, I don't know. Am I obliged to watch every video I'm invited to watch? If someone demands that I comment on their work, do I have to comply with that demand? Is that how things work now?

Or is this just Not The Way To Do It?

EDIT:

This just in (a response to a mail I sent asking the questions directly above):

lol Graham
No Wonder People Want To Break Your Legs.
It Called Being POLITE, Every Sub On My Channel I Support,
If You Want To Take That Approach It Don't Surprise Me.
Tell You The Truth I Am So Glad You Sent This Mail, It Tells Me All I Need To Know About You.
I Have Always Supported Your Channel.
This Is How You Treat People.
Really How Hard Would It Of Been, Just To Be Nice.
You Are No Different From Any Other Semi Famous Person.
I Hope I Don't End Up Like You Bud.
My Music Might Suck, But At Least I Can Write And Play Music.
I Really Enjoyed Your Mail
I Guess Its Easy To Stamp On People Like Me, When Your People Like You.
May Good Fortune Smile On You Always

 

I'll be back

Hello internet, how have you been? Still loving kittens? Okay then.

I've had no access at home for the last few months, and a day job directing a TV series that has eaten up all my Grey Bloke time... But this year will be different! Today was spent re-writing scripts, and over the next few weeks I'll be putting a lot of videos into production.

Then, later this spring, there'll be a series of weekly Grey Bloke cartoons. Weekly! How about that? It's a promise*.

So, my apologies to anyone who has felt let down by the lack of audiovisual content over the last year. Hold on just a little bit longer and Graham will be back.

And let's hope you still find him funny.

*promise may be negated by illness, depression, acts of God etc. Standard disclaimers apply. Your statutory rights are not affected.

The Manosphere

I'm getting a lot of criticism of my latest video from self-identified Men's Rights Activists, and I'm tired of dealing with it on YouTube so here's a blog post in response.

The main accusation seems to be that I've misrepresented, or "strawmanned", the Men's Rights Movement (MRM) by implying that it's made up of men who are angry because they're not getting laid.

That accusation is partly true. It's a comedy video and it's less than two minutes long; some oversimplification is inevitable.

However, my critics are (perhaps deliberately) ignoring the fact that "the manosphere" includes more than just the MRM. More seriously, they deny that "the manosphere" is chock full of hysterical misogynist bullshit (written largely by men who do seem to be angry because women aren't giving them the respect (and/or sex) they feel they deserve). And the denials don't hold up to scrutiny.

I've used way too many parentheses in that paragraph.

Anyway, I only know what I know about "the manosphere" because I've spent the last few months enjoying the Manboobz blog. And according to my critics that means I'm misinformed and don't really understand what's going on - because Manboobz is misandrist propaganda written by an evil feminist "mangina".

In reality, what Manboobz does is seek out examples of misogyny on the internet and then take the piss out of them. There are new posts nearly every day that quote directly from articles and forum discussions and provide links to the context - so charges of misrepresentation are false. Manboobz also links to the most prominent sites in "the manosphere", allowing people to explore them in more detail if they wish.

The site list points not only to MRM sites, but also to MGTOW (Men Going Their Own Way) and PUA (Pick Up Artist) sites - and most of those sites link to each other, creating a cosy little bubble of internet woman-hate and claims that men are, as a gender, oppressed. There's a lot of conflation of feminism and fascism, and talk of conspiracies and men needing to "take the red pill" (like in the documentary The Matrix) to wake up to the horrible reality of what's happening. The rhetoric is very similar to the stuff you see on White Nationalist sites, but with a secret gender war replacing the secret race war that most of us don't realise we're engaged in.

It's laughable.

This is not to deny that discrimination against men does exist, and that there are issues affecting men that should be dealt with - of course there are. The problem is, as one of the authors of this excellent blog pointed out recently:

"The Men’s Rights movement, as a whole, just offers up a bunch of noise that makes it harder for people to find the actually helpful advice. "

I can't put it any more succinctly than that.

EDIT 26/7

This just in:

Sometimes I get spam

I got this "personal message" on YouTube yesterday:

somegreybloke First a quick Announcement

The days of relying on a newsletters, business cards, or voicemail to promote your business are over.

Thank Goodness, that was just too much work for too little results.

Horrible grammar aside - YES! Promoting my business with newsletters, business cards and voicemail WAS just too much work, and I'm glad those days are over.

Wait, I don't have a business...? Anyway:

Introducing the Improved way to promote your business, automated push button simple Video Messages to Mobile devices or Email!

It's easy and eye popping results are guaranteed.

Now you can magically automate your marketing message and deliver a series of engaging, interesting, informative and memorable video messages to virtually every prospect or potential referral partner you meet, automatically.

That sounds good. I would like to pop the eyes out of potential referral partners. And it uses magic! Tell me more.

Just imagine how far ahead of your competition you'll be when you follow-up with your clients, leads, or potential partners, within minutes of your meeting right to their mobile phone or email and all you did was push a button?

Okay, so I'm imagining that. I meet somebody - maybe at one of those businessy-type conventions I'm always attending, or in the airport Hilton bar when I have an unexpected layover, or on a snowboarding weekend - and within minutes of meeting this person I SPAM THEIR MOBILE PHONE WITH AN UNSOLICITED VIDEO MESSAGE. How could they not be thrilled?

And how much more powerful will your marketing be when you automatically send out engaging follow up video messages, to everyone you have contacted, on a regular schedule that you control. And all you did was set it up once? Thank Goodness, truly automated follow-ups are finally here.

You mean I can keep spamming them forever without doing anything? That will definitely definitely make them want to buy whatever it is I'm selling.

Thank you Internet Marketing People. Sorry I can't remember the name of your company or I'd promote it here.

Wahay!

Recently the combined SGB videos hit ten million views on YouTube. That's over 9000!

And it's only taken 72 videos and four years. In your face, Rebecca Black.

FAQ to the SGB

What happened to your videos Baby Photos and What You Can Find On The Internet?

YouTube took them down, I guess because somebody flagged them as inappropriate. You can find them here and here.

What software do you use to animate Some Grey Bloke?

The characters are drawn in Adobe Flash, and I use Magpie Pro and After Effects to do the lip sync, eye movements and blinks. I've used 3D programs like Blender to make some of the backgrounds. You can find blog posts relating to animation here.

I've also been trying out Anime Studio Pro, which is a less expensive alternative to Flash, though quite different in terms of use. Blog posts about that can be found here.

How long does it take to animate a minute of Grey Bloke talking?

I could probably do a minute in about three hours, but the process is so very tedious that I can only focus on it in short bursts so it usually takes several days.

Why don't you just use an automated lip sync program?

Because most of them don't work properly. If something like this were cheaper I'd give it a go.

Why don't you make more videos?

Because I'm lazy and I hate animating.

But I subscribed to your channel and I want more frequent uploads!

I saw Jessica Alba in a movie and I want to go to bed with her.

Eh?

I guess we all just have to learn to live with disappointment.

Why is the sound on some of your videos so bad?

Because I suck.

Why is Graham's voice different in some of the videos?

Because I suck.

I've written a script for a Grey Bloke video. Will you make it please?

Sorry, no.

I want some animation done and I don't have any money but lots of people will see it and it will be great exposure for you. Will you do it?

Sorry, no.

I notice that you are confused about God's plan for the salvation of his creation. Can we engage in correspondence so I can explain my view of Christianity (which is the correct view of Christianity, not like all those fake wrong views people keep sending you)?

Sorry, no.

But I really want to. I get Jesus Nectar points for every soul I save.

I'm happy for you but still not interested.

Why do you make fun of people's religious beliefs?

Because those beliefs are ridiculous.

Why do you make fun of the Prophet Muhammad (pbuh)?

Because all historical/mythological figures are fair game for comedy. And if one of those figures is idolised by people who will actually kill to defend his name, then making fun of him becomes "edgy".

But isn't it a bit easy and comedically hacky to keep mocking religion?

Yes it is, and I really would like to stop. But then some pope or imam says something stupid and oops, I'm off again.

What do you think of Ray William Johnson?

I cannot stand the fucking prick.

Is that really a frequently asked question or did you just want to say that you hate him?

Yeah, I probably shouldn't leave that in. It's not him I hate exactly, but the persona he affects and the fact that his success is built on replaying other people's uploads while he makes banal comments. But then his videos aren't aimed at me, and I'm just jealous really.

Are you Banksy?
No.

Can I ask a question that isn't on this list?

Yes, you can do it by leaving a comment below.

This year

... is turning out not to be such a good year for putting more Grey Bloke on YouTube.

I'm working on a stop-motion series, which doesn't leave much time or enthusiasm for doing even more animation at the weekends. So to those people sending me messages saying "Make more videos dammit" I can only apologise and reply: "No."

However, there may be an audio-only podcast in the works featuring Graham Murkett and quite an exciting guest star...